Dates...

Wednesday, December 03, 2008
[A disclaimer: Most of the following post is sarcastic. Due to the level of sarcasm involved, do not take it seriously. Do not believe what I said. Do not process the information. In fact, it would be best if you just didn't read it. Ignore this post like you do the rest of my posts. This will save you from the evils of sarcasm. Oh, except for the ending of this post, that part you can read without fear of sarcasm overload.]

As some of you may know, a two weeks ago I took a friend to "hang out" for a few hours. SHE is calling it a "date", but for me, it is "hanging out." Lets look at the facts:
A) Yes, I did pick her up, but she lives in my apartment complex, so it isn't like it was a long drive.
B) Yes, I did choose where we went, but we went to an ice cream shop where we had hung out before with friends.
C) Yes, I did pay for the "meal", but because that ice cream shop doesn't serve food after 4:00 PM, I only paid for ice cream... clearly paying for ice cream does not constitute a date.
D) Yes, we were mostly alone at the ice cream parlor that night, but at one point a small group from our church walked through the door, and we each talked to some people that we know, so we weren't alone ALL night.
E) Yes, I did walk her to her door, but it was because SHE insisted on it. AND there was no kiss. See? Clearly not a date.
F) And because the weekend before I had left my shoes at a friend's house, I was wearing sandals that night. Common sense says that if you are wearing sandals, it isn't a date.

So the facts all point to the fact that it wasn't a "date", it was "hanging out". Oh, and I hear Evan agrees that it was just "hanging out". See? I am not the only one!

However, I will say that I told Tiffany that once I buy "dinner" I would call it a "date", so I either have to plan to go to places that don't serve a full meal (like the movies), or I am going to have to move up in the world to "dating status."

OK, all sarcasm aside, I agree with our friend Sara (not to be confused with my sister Sara) that said that hanging out at an ice cream parlor is the perfect first date. The media shoves their version of what a date should be onto us, but I refuse to let the media define me. Why can't I decide what a good date is or isn't? Why does how well a date goes have to depend on how much money I spent, or how much kissing we did, or how many beers we had at a local bar? Why can't the perfect date simply be hanging out with a friend eating ice cream on a cold night?

Granted, one day I will plan dates that are much more romantic and personal, but for now I just want to enjoy time with a woman I like, and I don't need to spend a lot of money to do that.

Matthew

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